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Never Leave Me Alone / 寻找爱情的邹小姐 Novel ~♥


Never Leave Me Alone ~ 寻找爱情的邹小姐 

Protagonist: Su Yue Sheng and Zou Qi Qiao

Theme: 寻觅 Search

Brief Summary:

Ten years ago, they experienced the most heart-breaking love and most deep-seated hatred. She had loved him so much and he, so obsessed with her. She thought their love is unbreakable. However, when fate relentlessly breaks in, the blossom flowers faded and he left without a word. She only realize, at that moment, everything is nothing but a long deliberate conspiracy. She fell from heaven to hell. Love or hate, she said; If she truly forget, she would not want to remember.

Ten years later, all is just past smoke dissipated, she truly no longer remember. She thought she has a new love by her side, and passing clouds around him. They are just strangers far away from one another. However, when past memories flow back and the truth slowly reveals from the shutter. Fate grind off the dust and wind blow haze. Will they be able to seek back their long lost love from a decade ago?

Fei Wo Si Cun Novels

Author's Afterword:

I am in the middle of the ocean with boundless expanse of blue as I completed the final chapter of "Never Leave Me Alone". The weather was sunny in the early morning when I woke up, but as I look up now, the window outside is cloudy with heavy rain.

Life, perhaps, is like a ship. You will meet many people on board, some people are just mere acquaintance. Some people will share a very pleasant period of time with you. Some people will accompany you through the entire journey. You will never know who are the ones that will disembark midway. But at the end of day, when the ship docks at the final destination, everyone will go their separate ways.

Seems like a little sad ah, but that is life. Impermanence and merciless.

So, that is why we must write warm-hearted stories. Like a candle, in the eternal night, shine for ourselves, and shine for people we meet.

There was an interview when this novel has yet to complete. The reporter asked about the novel, I replied it has not finish. After pondering for a moment, I said there will be an afterword when it is complete. Because this novel is the first book after the passing of my father.

After saying this, tears rolled down of my cheeks in front of strangers.

Some things we thought were already long past, long enough to think that we are finally able to calmly bring them up again. However, we still lost control in the end. Because we jolly well know, what is lost, is lost. One will never recover them again.

After my father was gone, I will always think of him in those very usual days. Once, as I returned from Wuchang, the sky was very blue. And I also just burst into tears.

My mother has never mention about my father in front of me. I, also very seldom speak about my father in front of her. Both of us, are worried and careful not to sadden one another. Hence, we try our best to pretend that this incident is over.

However, many things in this world, does not mean that even when you clearly understand and accept reality, it will really never make you cry again.

The theme for "Never Leave Me Alone" is 'Search'. The process of writing this book is very painful. I was in the middle of break down, feeling that I can never engage in writing again. After resting for about half a year, I still finally manage to complete this story in the end. I told my friend, this story is not just about Ms Zou's process of searching for love*. During the period of time when writing this book, it is also my process of searching for my true self.

It does not mean now that we grew up, we will never lost ourselves. Adulthood's pressure and temptation is a lot more than childhood. One can easily give in and not knowing what you truly want in life.

Fortunately, I found myself back. Although the journey of doing so is very difficult and tortuous. But one can only choose to brave all the hardship and stress. In the midst of struggle and all, putting aside everything, I still furiously love writing. If that is so, just write then, continue to write with courage.

I actually enjoy writing the second half of the novel. Reason being, I am aware, that even though this is a story with joy and sorrow. The final outcome will definitely be bright and warm-hearted.

Because I have decided to be the person who holds the candle. Things are so impermanent, people so unpredictable, everyone can only move forward in loneliness in vast darkness. I would like to use my text as the candle, to shine your journey ahead, and to shine the encounter of you and me.

11 August 2014, 10.26am
Costa Atlantica

* The Chinese title of "Never Leave Me Alone", if literally translate, is "Ms Zou Searching for Love".


I finished reading "Never Leave Me Alone" during the lunar new year holidays (February 2016), almost two years after the completion of this novel. Fei Wo Si Cun is one of the first few Chinese authors I knew when I got my 'first taste' of Chinese novels. As I begin to 'dig' further into the Chinese novels world, I got to know many other novelists and indulged in different stories / writing styles.

It has really been a while since I read FWSC's books. Guess I just became more selective there after, hahaa! You see, because I feel that there is always a hint of sadness in FWSC's stories, hence I only read her novel once in a blue moon. I read "Never Leave Me Alone" in book cover and it comes in
two novels (Book 1 and 2).

Honestly, I kind of skimmed through book 1 which is the first half of the story. Because personally, I find their relationship (Su Yue Sheng and Zou Qi Qiao) rather strange. And I also dislike how cold and mean Su Yue Sheng treated Zou Qi Qiao. Su Yue Sheng obviously love Zou Qi Qiao very this the way a man treats his beloved? And just because Zou Qi Qiao told him previously not to remind her if she ever forgets about him. When she lost her memory, he really did just that! Keep her memory from her for the next ten years! Seriously? However, since its FWSC, I am not too surprise.

Anyway, I enjoy reading the second half of the story better (book 2, the beginning of their love). The book cover version only includes an epilogue of Lu Min, Su Yue Sheng's childhood friend and secret admirer. There are also a few other epilogues in the online version. I was hoping for an epilogue of Su Yue Sheng, but there is none. I thought it would be good to include one so as to let readers understand Su Yue Sheng better and also to make the novel more 'complete'. I am neutral towards this novel, do not really like it. This book will probably be adapted into dramas, just like some other FWSC's novels.

I decided to translate the afterword of FWSC because I find it quite meaningful and it must have been a very difficult period of time for her. Her afterword also makes me question what I truly want or love to do with my life. I think a lot of times we are all in the process of 'searching'. But no matter what, I hope all of us will not lost ourselves.

I love the positive way FWSC ended her afterword. Hope that she will continue to pursue her passion in writing with more happy and warm-hearted novels! And also for me, you and everyone else all over the world, to cherish the people we love around us, find love and meaning in life as we usher into the new year in 2016! >_<


  1. Did this novel have a Happy ending or a sad ending?

  2. If I remember correctly, this novel should comes with a happy ending. Enjoy reading! :)

  3. I thought of reading it but I'm hesitant because this is a step-mother's work after all. Would you agree to summarize a bit for me (in a private message) or to tell me, at least, if the male lead rapes the female lead at any point (without ever apologizing or expressing regret) ? I know she uses that a lot and I'm like "urgh"

    1. Hello, thank you for your comment! I read this novel exactly 3 years ago, it has been quite awhile hence to be honest, I have forgotten most of the story line. Especially so, as it is not my favorite novel of FWSC >.<

      However, I don't think there is a rape scene in this novel? Kindly correct me if remember wrongly. I can understand why you go 'urgh', cause I dislike it too. Gosh!

      Anyways, this book definitely has a happy ending. Hope you will still give it a chance ya! Enjoy reading! :)